Fool-proof resolutions for you to try

We here at the Argosy’s Humour HQTM think New Year’s resolutions are hard to stick to and, frankly, overrated. So, we’ve compiled a list of feel-good resolution suggestions that anyone can accomplish and feel good about!

Resolution 1: Eat a sandwich.This resolution has no time constraint, so at some point or another, it’s bound to happen!

Resolution 2: Be socially aware. You’re reading this paper aren’t you? Check this one off the list!

Resolution 3: Eat healthier. Life hack: This one can involve planning ahead. Next December, eat literally every processed thing you can, for every meal. Then, when January hits, eat one apple and this resolution is complete, after only one day! We said healthiER.

Resolution 4: Be more confident.

You just completed three of your resolutions. Not many people can say that! Congrats, you’re a true inspiration.

Carly Penrose