1. Exams got you like…?
d) 8===D ~
2. Your relationship with the professor is…?
a) purely physical.
c) Facebook official.
d) He’s such a cool guy. I heard
he drank a beer with a student last semester!
3. Your masturbation habits lately?
a) Fast and Furious
b) Un-lotioned twisting, to prolong both studying and climaxing.
c) Ew…buddy. I get too many girls for that!
d) No jerking-off whatsoever to increase testosterone and motivation.
4. Finish this sentence: “The true value of a liberal arts education is…”
a) “measured in how many bottles
of Sailor Jerrys are on the res shelf.”
b) “whatever the university
president tells us.”
c) “the small class sizes!”
d) “simple economics. Supply and
5. Describe your typical midterm preparation?
a) Put together a rough shantytown
on the main floor of the library.
b) “I just drank like three
c) The prof posts all the slides
d) A crumpled and incomplete set
of cue cards.
6. Which level of your own personal pyramid of Maslow’s Humanistic Theory of Personality are you ignoring to “probably get a B+?”
a) Physiological needs.
7. Ha! Gotcha! That was PSYCH question!
b) Fuck you.
c) ^Yeah, what he said.^
d) Will this be on the exam?
a) = 1 point 7-14 points = Mildly fucked.
b) = 2 points 15-22 points = Like, super fucked.
c) = 3 points 23-30 points = Fucckkkkkkk.
d) = 4 points 30-37 points = It’s a bird course, bahd.
24-30 = Literally fucked.