As someone who struggles with both impulsivity and addictive tendencies, I could never have just two drinks. Two drinks would turn into three, then four, five – until I inevitably ended up hanging my dizzy head in the toilet for the rest of the night. This wasn’t just happening on Saturdays, either. I eventually came to a point when all I could focus on was getting through my classes so I could unwind in the evening… alone in my bedroom with an entire bottle of wine, day after day. This became my normal, and I was so lost in the blurriness of my mind that I hardly thought much of it all.

One day, after realizing that I had blown far too much money on alcohol that week, I began to think about sobriety. I laughed about it at first – me? Sober? Do people even contemplate going dry before they turn, like, 50? I ran the idea by my girlfriend, hardly believing the words that were leaving my mouth, and we decided to both try going sober for one week. Looking back, I remember feeling as though the week would last forever. I can clearly recall being on the verge of panic when I thought about lasting seven days without the comfort of my go-to coping mechanism.

As it turns out, the experience was an eye-opening reminder that I am capable of so much more than I think I am. After one week, my head was clearer, my concentration had improved and I found myself having solo dance parties in my room in the evenings instead of pouring myself another vodka Diet Coke. I was so relieved that all it took was seven days to start feeling human again. When I checked in with myself at the one-week mark, I knew that it was time to commit to sobriety, no matter how scary the idea seemed.

I am now celebrating two months sober, and I am so proud to say that I didn’t settle for a lesser life. Didn’t settle for all those wretched hangovers that left me depressed and crying on the bathroom floor. Didn’t settle for letting my family worry themselves sick over how I’d been living. This body is my home, the only one I’ve got, and it feels like a miracle to finally be treating it as such.

I’m not saying that sobriety is for everyone – I think and hope that most people are able to drink in moderation, and that’s awesome (I’m low-key jealous). But if your story resembles mine and you’re looking to make a change in your life, you have nothing to lose by giving sobriety a shot. We can walk through it together.

At the end of the year, my grades were good. I had been exercising several times a week and trying to eat well. I left my dorm long enough to go out for coffee with friends before dragging myself back to my desk to study. I had done everything I could to fit the image of the “perfect student” that I had in my head.

And yet, I was miserable, and the facade I had created eventually fell apart. When faced with difficulties, I chose to bury what I was feeling rather than meet it face-to-face. Sometimes, those emotions would surface and threaten to swallow me whole, and I didn’t yet have any healthy coping mechanisms that would help me deal with them. I began feeling lost and distant from the rest of the students around me, and I started leaving my room less and less.

If I’ve learned anything since last year, it’s that this is no way to live.

I put too much emphasis on my schoolwork and not enough on my mental health. I knew how to write papers and exams, but I didn’t know myself.

I’ve learned that self-care is anything but selfish – it is self-preservation, and could even be considered an act of rebellion in a society that doesn’t value taking breaks. So if you haven’t heard it lately, this is your reminder to put your books and pencil down and breathe if you’ve been working for too long.

When was the last time you did something for yourself? Ask yourself: am I overwhelmed? What do I need right now? If you’re hungry, take the time to eat. If you’ve been studying for too long and your brain is turning into mush, get up. Remember that being gentle with yourself only when you’re content is the same as watering the plants only when it’s raining. You can take that bath, or go for that walk, or talk with that friend. Self-care doesn’t need to be extravagant – sometimes it is just simply letting yourself be still in a world that is go, go, go.

If you’re struggling today, if the towering pile of schoolwork in front of you is too much to bear, please know that it is perfectly okay to look after yourself first. Let this article be your permission slip to walk away from your responsibilities for a little while – I promise they won’t seem so heavy when you return.

As I realized that the small pro-choice rally I was planning on attending in Dieppe was quickly approaching, I decided to check in with myself: What does it mean to be pro-choice? Why am I willing to bear a sign that simultaneously proclaims my feminism and puts a target on my back? Will attending the event be worth the scrutiny from bystanders that I may have to experience?

The answer is yes and it will always be yes.

The possible judgement I may face on the day of the rally is just a microscopic portion of what those who have had abortions must deal with. Day after day, they endure ignorant comments, hateful views and even death threats, simply because at one point they were pregnant and did not want to be anymore. Undereducated dudebros view them as unruly. Conservative men in positions of power have deemed them a burden. Even other women have turned their backs on their friends in need.

I wish it was more widely accepted that people who have had abortions are people – people who are intelligent and determined and self-sufficient. If women were respected and trusted, the opinion that they are capable of making decisions that solely affect their own lives would not be viewed as radical. The idea that a woman should be forced to carry and give birth to a baby against her will, however, is a radical and violent stance that needs to be extinguished.

I am pro-choice because I’ve had enough of men in power governing women’s bodies. If a person does not have the reproductive organs needed to become pregnant, then it is not up to them to lament the ethics of pregnancy and choice (and even if they do, they still shouldn’t try to manage others’ bodies). In a society where those who are making laws to restrain certain bodies are primarily men, it is discriminatory to limit the freedom of those who are underrepresented.

I am pro-choice because a pregnancy should not be obligatory. Denying someone of their right to choose is a violent attempt to keep them in their place. There are endless reasons as to why someone may not want to carry a pregnancy to term, and all of them are valid and acceptable. I am pro-choice for the woman who was raped by someone she cared about; for the trans man who isn’t ready to have children; for the person who simply has better things to do. These reasons, however, should not matter. I want to live in a society that supports those who have abortions and works to dismantle the systems of oppression built to keep women in check.

I choose to stand with those who have had abortions today and always. You are more than welcome to join me.